Metal Cowboy Mayhem

Sending out books at the post the other day, corraling Matteo with one hand and balancing a box of lego toys while trying to keep a bounce in my step despite the crushing line of people during a non-holiday rush time of year.Post offices are running on less and less staff, So be it – the worker who I landed in front of was well beyond her “working with the public” expiration date. We went back and forth a few times about stuff that needed to be blacked out on one envelope – see, I try to do my part by reusing as many good packages as possible – but this worker was itching for a fight – when she and I both realized that the customs label to Canada went right over the space that she’d just made me blot out with my own sharpie -I made eye contact – smiled, but strange as it is to believe – held my tongue. Then she started giving me a hard time about how one envelope had too much tape on it, another not enough – I almost got out the cardboard book of goldilocks and the three bears stashed in the chariot trailer just so I could read along with her commentary. Finally, I just had to ask,” Mam, why are you giving me such a hard time?”
She lit up like someone had handed her an extra ball to throw at the bottles along the midway. She lived for moments like these, you could tell. “Son, if I were giving you a hard time you’d be in tears and calling for your momma. Hard time? I could break you… like that!”
She stamped her stamp. I stepped back. Clearly someone had already broken her – or maybe the years, the disappointments – who knew – but her threat made me laugh, a hearty, sincere laugh.
“Lady, I’m the father of three boys, with a fourth son on the way. You couldn’t make me cry if you had all day.” The postal worker next to her broke out laughing, folks in line joined in. Matteo even started to chuckle, then offered the woman a lego man as an olive branch.She was not amused. I dd not cry. I only hope those books make it to their destinations.

Starting .. well, starting now I guess. I have new books, out and coming out, a bunch of stuff going down, shows, calendars, world tours or at least national tours, or part of the nation, OK, beyond my zipcode – and lots of other stuff – including a fourth son on the way in March. We’re calling him Sawyer – yes, after Mark Twain’s character, though Beth will tell you it’s after her favorite character on lost.. About the large number of kids running around here or soon to be, I know… if we have any more I’ll be asked to move the whle operation to Utah.

So maybe I start blogging a bit more in 2010. No promises but I’m gonna try to keep it hot, fresh, moving and regular – now I sound like a commercial for fiber medicine. At any rate, stay tunedwhile I bang on these keys with more frequency and see if I can’t connect with more of you guys this year. Let you know what’s happening beyond the facebook nonsense – my mood is fierce and I had oats for breakfast.

For instance, we’re gonna pedal in Portland’s first annual Tweed ride Saturday 11am leaving from the downtown fountains. Me and all the boys and acres of cordoroy and Cosby sweaters. That’s where I’ll be next if anyone wants to know or join – in tweed, but sans pants? I thought I’d get a jump on naked bike ride day – half naked tweed day – OK, maybe not – I was naked on a bike in Africa recently – there’s video out there somewhere. So maybe that’s enough nakedness in saddle for one calendar year. Til my next post, stay safe and stray well.

Kids Fest

The Metal Cowboy will be appearing as a guest speaker
and will have a booth at this years Kids Fest!

The North West’s Largest Family Expo!
April 24-25, 2010
Portland Expo Center
Visit:  www.pintsizedproductions.com

One Million Bicycles
A National Cycling Rights Movement

08/09/2009 A National Day Of Action and Celebration

The Revolution Will Not Be Motorized!

On a single day, over one million riders will roll out and gather across America for unified rallies in every major city and at the nation’s capital:

Why?

*To Support Congressman Earl Blumenauer’s National Bike Bill

http://bikeportland.org/2008/02/29/blumenauer-introduces-the-national-bike-bill/

*To Call For A Doubling Of Current Funding For Bicycling In The Federal Transportation Bill and in every State Transportation Appropriation.

*To Put The National Media Spotlight On Cycling As A Viable, Clean Form Of Transportation, Key To National Security, Reducing Obesity, Global Warming, Pollution, Congestion And Need For Foreign Oil.

*To Give Away One Million New And Used Bicycles – Creating One Million New And Returning Riders.

*To Celebrate The Joy and Benefits Of Riding Bikes
(The Biggest One Day, 50 State Pedalpalooza Ever)

PART 1 08/09/09 Rides And Rallies

Riders and supporters register ($5) for the event at onemillionbicycles.org or at their participating local bike shop, bike club, university etc. They receive an online registration packet, number, specific ride and rally location/details, a bike giveaway card, pledge sheet etc.

Ride leaders and rally coordinators are being recruited/enlisted in cities across America. National kindred organizations within the cycling world/industry and beyond (environmental, social, sustainable business etc.) will help get the word out, recruit, link, table, advertise, banner.

On 08/09/09 each participating city and Washington DC will hold rides to the rallies. (Participation in these formal rides is not required or feasible for all, based on the numbers we’re attracting. We envision a core ride in every city and other riders pouring in from their homes in informal groups, pairs, theme teams, etc.)

There will be a coast to coast and specific long distance group rides pedaling to the DC Rally. There will be a designated online registration for these.

Riders in each city will meet up at a specific time and location for an organized Rally. Each Rally will be branded/go by the same name and will include spender food, booths, press conference, speakers, music, activities, presentation of onemillionbicycles support for National Bike Bill, and the coveted create a new rider million bikes giveaway.

The $5 registration fee:

75 cents of every dollar pays for the repair, tune up of used bikes and purchase of new bikes for the giveaway.

15 cents of every dollar to promotion and ride/rally support.

10 cents per dollar on the first $500,000 to admin. 8 cents on the next $500,000 capped @ 5 cents or less thereafter.

PART 2 Giving Away One Million Bicycles

What better way to support the merits, joys and future of cycling as a viable transportation in America than to participate in getting, than giving away one million used, rehabbed and new bikes?

It’s estimated that 25 million bicycles sit in garages and basements, unridden year after year. We’ve gone from hunters and gatherers to hoarders and storers. Regular riders often have upwards of a half dozen retired frames or full bikes gathering dust.

Where do these bikes come from?

Each rider and supporter who registers for the onemillionbicycles rides/rallies pledges to secure at least one used or new bike by 08/09/09 and/or recruit one non rider or returning rider. These bikes will be brought to participating bike shops, community cycling centers before the rallies for distribution. A few of these giveaways/stories will be “spotlighted” during the rallies on stage and for the media in each city. the rest will be visually marked by colorful cards that each rider will hold up during the rallies at the same time – showing just how many bikes can be put into use when a community steps up.
*Registered riders can donate one or more of their own frames, bikes. (competitions – prizes and awards for most bikes donated, secured.)

*Solicit family, friends, coworkers, neighbors for their garage stored bikes not being used.

*Recruit family, friends, coworkers to let onemilliobicycles rehab their old bikes if they ride it to the event and join the ride pledge program

*Additionally, onemillionbicycles.org is recruiting giveaway teams, coordinators, rolling out phone and in personal campaigns to acquire bike donations.

*onemillionbicycles.org is recruiting bike manufacterers to partner with the giveaway – purchase new bikes in discounted bulk, matching programs.

How will onemillionbicycles.org determine who gets a free bike?

Anyone who does not already have a bike is eligible by completing a giveaway application and committing to the giveaway requirements: which includes pledging to ride the bike X amount per week (to be determined) to work, school, errands, and documenting this by sharing their experiences via a onemillionbicycles blog, newsletter, press releases, letters, photos, stories, etc.

onemillionbicycles.org will use 75 percent of the $5 ride/rally registration fee to repair, rehab and safety tune up used bikes and buy new bikes before the giveaway.

onemillionbicycles.org is not being structured to become a lasting institution. Think of this in the same terms as a political campaign with a start and end date. We plan to operate from March 1 2008 – December 31, 2009. 

There are a host of fantastic bicycling organizations  and we don’t want to become a group that exists to support ourselves over the long term. We want to give voice to specific needs, host specific events during a given timeframe and  work with existing groups and programs to get and distribute one million bicycles.  After Jan 1 2010. We will continue to operate  the blog to keep new riders stories and trials and triumphs alive, turning over any operating needs to a worthy kindred organization. To do this a group called shift2bikes  offers an umbrella  non-profit status  for specifc projects. This will be one of those projects. As for the political component and violations of  non-profit status depending on how much policial action  an organization does, we will follow all funbding  rules for what can be tax deductable etc. based on time and funds going for educational, bike giveaways vs political endeavors.

Q&A

Who Is This Ride/Rally For?

Everyone and Anyone who rides or has every ridden a bike in any form ( Roadies, MT Bikers,commuters, messengers, fixies, weekend riders, racers, adventure cyclists, tall bikes, zoobombers, tandems, bents, cyclocrossers, trikes, kids bikes etc.) or who supports the National Bike Bill and the ideals and actions of onemillionbicycles.org. We want to get a broad base involved. Family, businesses, schools, governments, civic groups, youth, retirees.

Revolution? Are We Overthrowing Something by Force?
Think personal, community and social revolution through example and large scale, positive action. We want to change the landscape, both politically and physically – so that it’s safer for everyone to use bicycles. We are doing that by showing our numbers, making specific measurable requests and by actually putting additional bikes under non riders and riders who haven’t pedaled in awhile.

Is This Anti-Car?
onemillionbicycles.org is probicycle. We would like everyone to drive cars less, yes, but we are not a militant group, We’re you. That person who knows we can make a cleaner, healthier society by driving less and shifting our transportation choices to bikes some of the time. That person who knows it will help reduce the overall carbon imprint America places on the world for many reasons – foremost because our energy consumption and transportation choices is effecting our quality of life, threatening our national security, hurting our health our environment. Increasing funding for the national cycling infrastructure will save lives and improve conditions for vulnerable users of the road.

How Can I Help?

Register for the ride, recruit others, spread the word through forums, clubs, blogs, get your local bike alliance involved, find bike(s) for the giveaway, become a rally coordinator in your city, rally team volunteer, become a giveaway project coordinator, a givaway phone volunteer, direct  bike donation team volunteer. Contact  Joe Kurmaskie mtcowboy@teleport.com www.metalcowboy.com

How Can I get a Bike?

Anyone who does not already have a bike is eligible by completing a giveaway application and committing to the giveaway requirements: which includes pledging to ride  the bike X amount  per week (to be determined) to work, school, errands, and documenting  this by sharing their experiences via a onemillionbicycles blog, newsletter, press releases, letters, photos, stories, etc.

Who Is Organizing This?

Onemillionbikes.org  is a direct response to Senator Earl B’s Bike Gallery event calling for the public to foster a national bicycle movement. The project is the brainchild of Joe Metal Cowboy Kurmaskie, best-selling author, nationally syndicated columnist, journalist for Bicycling Magazine, Men’s Journal, Outside, Parenting, headlining performer, cycling safety  advocate and activist. the roots of this idea came out of The November 2007 rally held in Portland Oregon after a rash of cycling deaths. That rally helped change the way the police investigate car/cycling accidents and helped shape the tone and conversations in the cycling vs driving debates.

Because Kurmaskie has managed nonprofits (national renowned arts council, science education programs, and summer camps) he has the administrative background . His live performances in school, libraries, headlining expos and performing for 600 plus bicycling related organizations in the past 7 years, gives him the connection and platform to unify these groups and pull off a large scale project like onemillionbicycles.org